Chinese Democracy

No, this is not a post about the politics (for once), it is about a so-called album put out by a so-called band.

Appropriately named, too, since it probably never will occur.

Now, many of you, like I, were fans of Guns-N-Roses. Their first album, "Appetite for Destruction" featured a bluesy-type form of anti-authoritarian music that appealed to any 17 year old teenage male. Like me. Furthermore, it may have been the album that launched the change in taste from hair bands to "punk" (or, actually, grunge). You think that the kids of the 1980's were going to switch to Nirvana from REM (yecch!!!) Guns and Roses, despite having only one great, and two ok, albums, was truly a titan for that era.

That is one of those nearly sacrosanct albums where only a certain group of people can recall the truly great songs of it. Sure it is remembered for "Jungle," "Paradise City" and "Sweet Child," but those who were of the age group to whom it was devoted had as their favorite songs "Night Train" and Rocket Queen," especially the second part.

And they put out two more albums, "Lies" and "Use Your Illusion" (I & II). Then all the members left the group, except for Axl, and he decided to create his own album, with a whole new group of musicians.

There are some problems, however. First, much as he would like to make it appear, Axl is not akin to Jim Morrison. Like David Lee Roth, he could have easily been replaced and the band would have remained successful (if it remained true to the sound of "Appetite").

Here is another problem. Only one rock band has successfully put out an album approximately once a decade and gotten away with it - for a while. That band, Boston, succeeded largely because it made it's music while rock n roll was still the dominant music of the high schools. Today, of course, that is not the case, and they are at least 50, so it really cannot succeed. See my earlier post on the Stones.

While Axl has been busy shooting up smack - or consuming meth, if we are to believe the white-trash persona that this band presented - there has been a big change in the taste of music. Today, for high school kids (those who do most of the consuming of pop music) it's either Konaye West, Kelly Clarkson, or for those who do not like contemporary music, it's the country bands, that they listen to. It is my impression that if kids like rock, they tend toward contemporary metal, which consists not only of loud guitars, but apparently, the same singer on every song, regardless of band, who sounds like he is consistently attempting to throw up, in a bad attempt to mimic Pantera's 1988 "Cemetary Gates."

In the meantime, he takes a long time to write, maybe, ten songs. And I have heard some of them. One I heard tonight, "IRS," sounds awful. I have no idea what the lyrics say - those who are into rock rarely listen to lyrics. The callers all mentioned that they hated it - just like the other stuff that has come out. Only that it sounds nothing like "Appetite."

At the same time, his original audience has left high school, started careers, families, and lives. They do not follow bands - unless they are single and spend time writing sarcastic comments in blogs. Sure, we still like rock, but we want to buy good stuff.

And, downloads have changed the picture, too. Even if you are honest, albums are obsolete - you can download the songs individually and pay whatever fee is charged. Unless the album is chock full of good music, has no filler, and will be cheaper and a better value than downloading all those songs.

The lesson? The audience for this band - whose prominence only really lasted 3-4 years - will not buy this crap. Because they have better things to do with their money.

I do have a suggestion, however, if Axl really wants to sell records. He can think (if he is not so drug addled) and try to figure out the spirit, and sound, behind "Appetite" Then write many, many, songs. These are not really that hard to put together.

Then, do test marketing. Here's a clue. Stay away from Los Angeles, New York, Seattle. The audience is not located here.

Instead, this was really a heartland band - despite coming from Los Angeles. If the heartland is not listening to stuff from Nashville, it is listening to rock.

Thus, you need to go to the heartland. I suggest test marketing the album in places like Fresno, Cleveland, Indianopolis, Kansas City, Pittsburgh, Mobile, Minneapolis. Even Nashville! Then you will find what your audience, people of my age, will buy.

I can then guarantee a level of success, as many relatively young adult men will wish to re-live their youth.